Category: Story

The Yin-Yang of Hot Springs, Montana

Pam and I spent a lovely afternoon this past weekend soaking in the healing waters at the Symes Hotel in Hot Springs, Montana. It can be crowded at times as it was on this afternoon, but it is somehow always a peaceful experience despite being supremely entertained by the conversations going on around us. For example.

Person 1 – I just watched Ace Ventura for like the 500th time.

Person 2 – Oh was that the one with that Wolf Harrelson guy?

Person 3 – Uh, no.

Person 1 – Uh, Jim Carrey.

Person 3 – (whispers) Doesn’t he mean Woody?

Person 4 – (enters pool)

Person 2 – Hey, where are you from?

Person 4 – (raspy voice) Over in Idaho now but I moved from Alaska.

Person 2 – I haven’t eaten any processed food in years, haven’t been sick in a long time. You should try it, only eat what you grow or get from locals. Haven’t had a cold and been healthy ever since.

Person 4 – Might try that.

Person 2 – Ever see those books about Grizzly Bears in Alaska? Bear Tales and I think the sequel is More Bear Tales.

Person 4 – No, don’t believe so.

Person 5 – Don’t want to ever run into a Grizzly.

Person 2 – Especially when they are charging right at you, you know, you have to be carrying a high powered rifle, like a 30 ought six and place the bullet just right.(finger between eyes)

Person 6 – No, you need to get them right here.(motions with finger right under jaw.)

Person 2 – Yeah, but good luck when they are charging with their head down.

Person 7 – No, you need long knife, 12 inch minimum. Get them to stand up and then plunge it right through the throat. (snaps his fingers)

Person 6 – Yep.

Person 2 – You want to talk dangerous though, your talking Moose.

Person 7 – I heard they are good eating.

Person 2 – They are good eating, dangerous, but good. But if you want good eating ever had Walleye?

Person 6 – You mean fish? Is that like Whitefish.

Person 2 – No, it’s a like Walleye.

Person 7 – We eat Perch.

Person 2 – Never liked Perch, too bony, but Walleye is like perch without the bones.

Person 3 – What about What’s eating Gilbert Grape?

Person 1 – Oh, I love that movie, that’s one of the best ever and Johnny Depp is awesome.

Person 2 – Who’s in that one?

Person 1 – Uh, Johnny Depp. And Juliette Lewis and that other guy. I’ve watched that so many times.

Person 3 – Yeah, it’s like my favorite movie of all time.

Person 2 – What’s the storyline on that one?

Person 1 – Oh, there’s no real storyline. It’s kind of like To Kill a Mockingbird, you know, there’s no plot. It’s just like one scene after the next.

Person 7 – Our daughter raises chickens, so we get our eggs from her.

Person 2 – How many chickens did you say do you have?

Person 6 – We don’t. Our daughter raises them, but we get our eggs from her.

Person 7 – We have a small farm though and grow our own food.

Person 2 – What do you grow?

Person 7 – Potatoes and…

Person 2 – What kind of potatoes?

Person 6 – Yukil grown

Person 2 – What?

Person 7 – Yukon Gold

Person 6 – We haven’t gone to a store in years, we get everything from what we grow or buy from local.

Person 2 – That’s the only way to go these days, you know you never know what they put in food now.

Person 7 – Our potatoes. You can slice them and there is no white stuff like you get in store bought potatoes. Just totally clean, only potato.

Person 2 – What do you mean white stuff, like pesticide, fungicide?

Person 7 – No, like Starch.

Person 6 – We don’t put starch in the potatoes we grow.

Person 2 – They put all kinds of stuff in food now. But you just have to know what you are looking for. I had these warts you know and found this stuff with chickweed, bloodroot and Salvia… you know they call it Black Salve. I put it on these warts, covered them and after a few days, they just fell off. You know, it leaves a big hole but that heals up after a few days. I just had one right here next to my bellybutton, see…

Me – (eyes closed) Om

Pam – Om